“Freeze this moment a little bit longer; make each sensation a little bit stronger.” -Time Stand Still by Rush

You might have noticed (or maybe you didn’t, but I’d like to think you did) that I haven’t been around for the past month. I’ve been having a bit of a minor mental breakdown. You see, in one week, I’m going to be Officially Old. Not official like in Logan’s Run, where the government kills people once they reach a certain age. See, a Logan’s Run reference – proof of my oldness! And I’ve not been dealing well with it. But official by Seven-Year-Old Me’s standards.

The Big 4-0 is creeping up on me with all the stealth of an atom bomb, and I can’t help but wonder, what the hell happened?

I’m barely ready to face my 30’s gracefully, and here I am knocking on 40’s door. I’m not saying that all my readers who are over 40 are old – but just that I’m not ready to be 40!

When I was seven, I used to think how incredibly ancient 40-year-olds seemed. I figured by the time I was 40, I’d have written 10 books, I’d have a family, would have my life figured out, and most importantly, I’d be flitting around in one of those Jetson’s flying cars.

Somehow, through some kind of dumb luck and not at all due to my charms, I managed to have a family. But, I’m no closer to having life figured out. Nor do I have 10 books written, though I have half of one book I’m co-writing in progress and a book of my comics published (which is all kinds of cool in itself). And as for the Jetson’s car? Well, that part’s not my fault.

Long story short, I’m facing 40 as I faced 30 – full of regret for a life not lived.

But, unlike age 30, I am no longer crippled by the same fears I once had. And I actually believe in myself a bit more than I did. I’ve actually done some incredible things this decade, things I would’ve never thought possible from where I was at age 29. And the regrets don’t sting as much when I’m actually moving toward something.

It with those mixed feelings of regret and blossoming confidence that I told myself I would have a book done by the time I turn 40. So, last week, I started it. Yes, I’m writing a book in two weeks, so take that, Na-No-Wri-Mo!

To be fair, the book is being co-written by my partner, Sean Platt (who has also been absent from his site, surely further advancing rumors that he and I are the same person) and I. However, unlike Available Darkness (which isn’t dead – just on hold) we aren’t writing it together chapter-by-chapter. I am writing the whole thing then passing it to him for him to work on. So, technically, I am writing a book. In two weeks.

The story began with an idea he’d been storing in his Vault of a Million Ideas.

Sean pitched it to me a few months ago about something we could someday work on. However, something about the story resonated with me long after our discussion. I suggested some changes which really made it the best of both our ideas – a truly magical idea that I don’t think either one of us would’ve written solo.

The story is different from my normal fiction. For one, it’s geared towards fifth or sixth graders. Second, it’s humorous. But where the story really shines is the relationships between fathers and sons. It has something serious to say, something that adults can also enjoy.

I’d love to tell you more, but I’ve got a book to get back to. I’m not getting any younger, you know.

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It was one year ago that I met my writing and business partner, Writer Dad, Sean Platt.

The only reason we met is because he “stole” my domain name of Writer Dad. For those that haven’t already read this story, it was last summer when I found myself laid off from my job as a newspaper reporter. I was pretty much at my lowest point in life, as I’d just lost a job I loved – make that the only job I’ve ever had that I loved. I was looking for something new and decided to start a blog to keep my writing fresh and perhaps land a writing gig somewhere.

And I had the perfect name in mind, WriterDad.com.

The name was available, too. Which for those of you who have searched for domain names only to find all the best ones already taken, it’s a pretty big deal when such an awesome find is made.

The only problem was that was also in love with another domain which I opted to get instead. Almost immediately, I changed my mind and wanted to get WriterDad. However, when I went back to get it – it was gone!

Immediately, I typed in the url and saw that some joker named Sean Platt was now using the domain. And I wanted to hate him for “stealing” my name from me.

However, after reading his stuff, I was blown away. Here was a guy writing from the heart and writing some very powerful, thought provoking stuff.

On a whim, I decided to email him and tell him the story of the domain name story and ask him if he’d like to be interviewed for my new site, BloggerDad. I fully expected him to see my email as some sort of  “new guy” kissing up to a more established blogger hoping to share in the glory, which is not my style at all. However, you can never really be sure of somebody’s intentions on the Internet.

His response was nothing short of the nice guy who I’d gotten to know through his writing, with none of the ego or hubris that often comes with people who find quick success.

From there, we hit it off immediately. We’re a lot alike and have similar stories of growing up, though doing so on different coasts. And creatively, we gel perfectly. Our strengths and weaknesses compliment one another and we’ve found that working together on our various sites and our book, Available Darkness to be an amazing creative process.

But more than a creative partner, I’ve found a friend who is honest, hardworking and funny as hell. We talk nearly every day and though we’ve never met, Sean has become one of my closest friends. We are creating worlds together. And as an artist, that is the ultimate dream.

Today marks a slight shift in one of those worlds as we’ve given our first online home together, Collective Inkwell a bit of a makeover. If you haven’t already checked it out, I invite you to do so now. We’ve also rebooted our ghostwriting site, Ghostwriter Dad. If Collective Inkwell is our studio/coffee bar, where we talk about creativity, then Ghostwriter Dad is our office where we talk shop.

See you tomorrow with more Blogger Dad Looking Back stuff that I should’ve posted yesterday.

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Second, I’ve got an awesome announcement to make, but I’ll save that for the end of this post.

This might surprise some of you, but most of my readers are female. I haven’t done any research into this, I’m going straight off my instincts, judging from the comments and emails I get. It doesn’t surprise me, though.

Growing up, most of my friends were girls. Seeing that I was not a) scoring with these girls and b) not in the drama club, I was something of an anomaly in my school.

I just happened to click with girls better than boys. It put me in a unique position of knowing how both guys and girls tick and why they rarely tick at the same speed. Well, as much as a guy can hope to know how a woman ticks, anyway.

If only I’d thought to put out a book at the time or something, I’d be incredibly rich now like that little arrogant kid that recently wrote a book on how to talk to girls. What does he know about talking to girls? He’s like what, 11? Hell, I could’ve written a book on how to UNDERSTAND girls! My book would have been so much more awesome than his!

One of the comments I get most from new female readers is that they like my blog because it gives them a chance to see parenting from a man’s perspective.

Many women complain that the innermost thoughts of the men in their lives are a mystery to them. Chances are good that your guy’s innermost thoughts are a mystery to them, too. A lot of guys don’t like to examine their thoughts too closely. Now before you think I’m bagging on guys, I’m not. We have good reason to be like we are.

Now, here’s the secret about men

It’s not that men don’t like to talk about our thoughts, it’s just that we’ve learned that doing so usually leads to… more talking about our thoughts!

There’s only so much talking we can do before we realize we’re running around the same track over and over with no hope of getting off. We’d rather take action, even if we do so without much thought sometimes.

Women, on the other hand, loooove to talk!

Women can have the EXACT SAME CONVERSATION 200 times. In fact, I think they prefer to have the same conversation, rather than a new one. It’s as comfortable a routine as crying while eating a half gallon of mint chocolate chip ice cream (a flavor which only women like, by the way). Especially if that conversation involves:

• why can’t they lose weight? (as they eat more ice cream)
• what a jerk their boyfriend is
• what a bitch (insert friend/frienemy/co-worker name here) is
• why won’t their boyfriend be less of a jerk?
• why their jerky boyfriend would rather hang out with his friends rather than her

Most guys on the other hand, don’t care to talk about things they have no control over. Especially when there’s a game on TV.

And in the days of 17 ESPN channels, there’s ALWAYS a game on TV.

Being in the position of having many female friends who wouldn’t sleep with me, we wound up talking. A lot. And I became sort of the Answer Guy to many of them. And ladies, there’s nothing more that a guy you won’t sleep with loves than being asked questions about other guys. Oh yeah.

Guys also came to me for advice when they didn’t know how to deal with the girls making their lives miserable.

And I always had the right answer. It’s one of the few talents I possess – always knowing what other people ought to do.

Of course, very few people actually heed my advice. Most people ask advice only to affirm the bad decision they’ve already chosen. Which means, of course, more conversations about the same damned things.

So, I figured as a service to both sexes, I would start answering questions for my readers. I’m going to call it Ask Blogger Dad. Sort of an advice column, but with a bit less cursing, and not nearly as cool as The (awesome) Blogess’s column.

So, if you have questions about anything, and want a sarcastic/and or a funny response, rather than real constructive  advice, comment here or send me an email at idrawcomics (at) gmail.com with “Ask Blogger Dad” as the subject line, and I just might answer it. If you comment here, I will use your name and url in the column. If you email me, you can specify if you want your name used.

Now, here’s the Big News.

I’ve been asked to write over at Chris Brogan’s Dad-O-Matic, a group blog with several awesome dads writing at it. I’m not sure if they recently lowered writing standards or if they actually like my stuff, but at any rate, they said I could write whatever I want.Well, probably not ANYTHING I want. But you get the idea.

So, I figured why not bring this new Ask Blogger Dad feature to their site?

If I get questions right away, I’ll post them this week and you’ll be the first to know when it goes live!

In other news…

Have you seen the re-design I did of Writer Dad’s site? Check it out. And while you’re at it, read his GREAT post on how to make your children better writers.

Collective Inkwell published the second installment of the vampire serial Available Darkness on Friday. If you missed part one, click here to catch up. We’re getting some great feedback.

Is this as good as it gets? Check out another unhappy comic for unhappy people over at IDrawComics which is probably why I’ll never get syndicated.

I got an award from the awesome Ribbon, which you can check out here. A huge thanks for the honor, Ribbon! I would post the image, but it’s got flowers, lots of pink flowers, and I think this post if this post gets an girlier, the other dads will likely point and laugh.

I’ve been meeting lots of cool new bloggers on Twitter. I’ve also had a lot of fun conversations the past week. I’ll post some highlights later in the week.

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Content is copyright 2009 BloggerDad.com. If you are reading this on any site other than www.Bloggerdad.com or your personal RSS reader, then you may be reading it on a site which steals content. And a site like that is probably up to all kinds of no good.