How Cars almost ruined The Super Bowl

David — Fri, 06 Feb 2009 07:42:40 +0000

Last week, I mentioned that my son saw his first movie, Disney’s Cars.

He’s asked pestered me to see it every day since.

I should preface this by saying that when my son watches a movie, he doesn’t watch the whole thing. About 15 minutes in, he starts playing with his toys, running around the living room or dancing. He LOVES dancing and even dances to commercial jingles! His favorite is “Five Dollar, Five Dollar Foot longs”. The point is, he is active, so I’m not as concerned as I would be if he were just sitting on the couch like a vegetable his father.

At any rate, he LOVES watching Cars. He MUST watch Cars! Every night.

Well, on Super Bowl Sunday it seemed that the unstoppable force was about to meet the immovable object.

Here’s the scene:
I’m getting ready to watch The Super Bowl. I’ve got my food and drinks ready and I’m looking forward to the game The Game.

I am kind of funny when it comes to watching The Game. Unlike most people, who use the game as an excuse to throw a Super Bowl Party and hang out in a place packed with people, food and liquor, I like to sit home so I can actually watch the game. Novel concept, I know, watching the game.

So I am fiercely protective of my game watching experience. While I would prefer to watch it in a cave without anyone around, I do have a family which for some reason, enjoys my company. However, if you’re going to watch the game with me, there are some ground rules.

Rules for watching The Super Bowl with Blogger Dad

Do not talk to me during the game – unless it’s about that awesome freaking catch.
No phone calls during the game
Do not walk in front of the TV during the game
Try not to injure yourself and need medical attention during the game.

Fairly simple rules, right?

So back to Sunday. Game time – 6:00 p.m. and my son was standing next to the couch, repeatedly saying in his cutest voice…

“Cars? Cars? Cars? Cars?”

He wanted to watch Cars. On Super Bowl Sunday!

He even handed me the remote which controls the DVD player, “Daddy,” he said as he handed it to me. “Cars?”

I cringed.

And here’s the worst part, I almost gave in. His cute raspy voice, those big blue eyes, My son has me so wrapped around his fingers that I nearly turned off The Game.

Evidence of E's cuteness: Eating a cookie!

I am ashamed and should probably return my testicles to whatever government agency is responsible for taking them once you lose your manhood (probably the IRS).

Fortunately, my wife managed to sidetrack E long enough that he eventually forgot Cars. So crises averted – this time.

Faced with the prospect of having to watch Cars every night for the next two years (or however long movie phases last with toddlers) I decided to do something.

Find out what on Monday…

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BloggerDad reviews the Super Bowl commercials

David — Mon, 02 Feb 2009 05:14:56 +0000

Wow, two Super Bowls in a row which looked boring on paper but which rocked the house. But enough about the game. Let’s talk about the reason you probably watched – the commercials.

I don’t know what you thought, but it felt like this year lacked any commercials that will inspire water cooler talk Monday.

Many companies toned down their advertising approach, fearful of looking too extravagant or apparently, making people laugh during such dire economic times. Hence, several commercials attempted to capture some sort of nostalgic feel good buzz that Joe Consumer would associate with their product.

In other words, lots of boring commercials. Here’s what I thought to be the best and worst of the night.

The worst Super Bowl Commercials

Fast and the Furious – the crappy movie trailer
A cinematic first! A movie by douchebags, starring douchebags, for douchebags! If you are a huge fan of this movie series, please unsubscribe from this feed now.

The only thing missing from this ad – The ShamWow Guy.

Cash 4 Gold:
I thought those Cash 4Gold commercials were awful without a budget. What happens when you give them Super Bowl mounds of cash to hire some big names? Well, this craptacular ad. So bad it should be labeled a hate crime.

Coke Zero – Mean Troy
This ad is a play on the classic and cute Mean Joe Green, where Mean Joe tosses his shirt to a kid. This updated version features Troy Palamayahoo (yeah, I’m too lazy to look up his actual name) of the Steelers. For his part, Troy did fine. The ad breaks down with the whole “Coke Lawyers suing Coke Zero because it tastes like Coke” ad campaign they keep trotting out like it isn’t the worst concept ever (which it is). Hello? It’s the same damned company! Maybe it would work if the ads were funny, but they are as about as funny as a car crash. Well, a car crash not involving a drunken Hollywood starlet. Because, those are always funny.

Go Daddy – The Shower and Enhanced
It’s not that the commercials are sexist, which they are, it’s that they are just awful. If you’re going to be sexist, and risk offending a big chunk of your potential customers, at least bring The Funny. Go Daddy failed on so many levels.

NBCs House Ads
Heroes is suffering badly enough without having the cast break into song routines. You’d think that as the network is about to come back from their “winter hiatus” they would want to remind people of what’s good about the show, not associate it with cringe-inducing ads during the frakkin’ Super Bowl!

“Hey, let’s make even more people think we suck!”

E*Trade – Talking Baby
Who can forget last year’s memorable E*Trade commercials with the talking baby who threw up in one spot and hired a creepy clown in another? This year’s entry failed to deliver anything new or funny. It wasn’t necessarily bad, but I was hoping for something better. So in with the bad it goes!

And now for the Good Super Bowl Commercials

Hulu – Alec and Huluwood
Best ad of the night!
Hulu wins for using the always funny (well, maybe not to his daughter) Alec Baldwin, who reveals that television is actually an alien plot to turn your brain to goo. I never thought I would see such truth in advertising!

Firestone – On the road with the Potato Heads
The best ad not featuring Alec Baldwin is this one which might be the commercial with the most replay value in the weeks to come. Nagging wife + ad = hilarity.

Bud Light – the meeting

Usually Budweiser brings The Funny several times during the Super Bowl. This year they seemed to place more of an emphasis on the lame horse commercials in attempts to appeal to … well, I don’t know who, horse lovers. Anyway, this was their funniest ad of the night.

Bud Light – Swedish

Bud Light + Conan O’Brien = funny.

Monster.com – Need a new job?
Given the high unemployment rate and the recession, I was curious how Monster.com would deliver. They indeed brought The Funny with this inspired ad capturing a feeling many workers are all too familiar with.

Cheetos : Chester the Cheetah

This Cheetos ad would’ve been funnier if it involved bird feces.

Career Builder – Tips
Another job search commercial. Who among us hasn’t screamed a time or 500 while banging at their steering wheel at the prospect of spending one more day at the same job?

Which commercials did you like? Which did you hate?

If you missed any, check them all out at Hulu.