I’ve had more than my fair share, most which have happened in front of attractive women. I once puked in front of my ex-girlfriend after we rode a carnival ride (no, that isn‘t why she is an ex). Yet, that isn’t my most embarrassing story.

First, it will help you to know that I’m a big guy. Standing almost 6 foot 4 and weighing nearly 350, I look like a football player – if said football player took a few years off and ate lots of cookies and cream ice cream. Let’s just say I look more like Kevin (King of Queens) James than Kevin Bacon.

In other words, I don’t look like the kind of guy who you’d see at a Lilith Fair concert.

Now, on with the story…

Nearly ten years ago, I used to work the overnight shift at a gas station/convenience store. During my time there, I encountered several threats of violence, was nearly involved in a shootout, helped some cops tackle a lunatic, witnessed more drug deals than I can count, and met the absolutely craziest people to grace this planet. Additionally, I was down the road from a strip club so I saw no shortage of half naked women on an almost nightly basis.

It was everything you could ask for in a job. Well, except it paid practically nothing. While the job provided me countless stories to someday tell (I could fill a whole other blog), it also gave me time to read, draw and write.

Sometimes, though, especially when it was slow and I didn’t get much sleep during the day, the job was dreadfully boring. When I was tired, I didn’t want to read, draw or write, I was looking for something a bit more exciting. So, usually, I would lock the doors, turn on the radio really loud, and sing while I cleaned the store from top to bottom.

Early one morning, around 5 a.m. or so, I had my stereo cranked up high, listening to a mix CD I made. I was singing alt/rock songs at the top of my lungs. I had just finished cleaning the store, and was back in my booth, counting cigarettes for my shift report. While most of the CD was rock songs, there were also a few singer/ songwriter Lilith Fair-type numbers from Sarah McLachlan and an Indigo Girls.

I was singing loudly along to an Indigo Girls’ “Closer to Fine” when I looked down from counting and saw that I had an audience.

Um…Um….

An attractive woman was waiting to buy cigarettes. God only knows how many verses she’d heard. But make no mistake, she heard at least four or five lines. Oh yeah, just in cast it wasn’t an embarrassing enough situation, I was also singing the song in a falsetto.

It’s bad enough that I KNOW the lyrics to an Indigo Girls song, but to actually SOUND like them… Yeah, that is about as far from cool as you can get if you’re a guy.

For a guy that looks like a linebacker, I have a surprisingly good falsetto. While this is cool when I am singing nearly note for note like Thom Yorke from Radiohead or Billy Corgan of Smashing Pumpkins, it’s not so cool when I’m singing something from The Indigo Girls.

“Uh, hi,” I said, to the woman.

I wanted to shrink into a crevice.To instantly vanish to another dimension. To hit rewind and kick out some Pearl Jam or Tool which would’ve been a bit less embarrassing.

Instead, I surprised myself by playing it off totally cool – or attempting to. I just kind of’ smiled in a way that either said, “Yeah, I was singing like a girl, I’m cool like that” or “Yeah, I’m a total ass.”

After she left, I cringed for about an hour… as I’m sure she did.

So, now that I embarrassed myself to the point that many of you may never read this blog again, it’s your turn. What is your most embarrassing tale?

On a side note, I got the idea for this post from SuperMommie, who got the idea from Absolutely Bananas. Thanks to them, both great blogs.

On yet another side note, thanks to my witty readers, some of the funniest stuff on this blog happens in the comments section. So be sure to join in the conversation and check back later to see the funny and at times, thoughtful responses. If you really want to stay up on the action, just click on the button when you post which will subscribe you to have all the comments for that post sent to you.

And on a third side note, I’d be remiss if I failed to mention that Writer Dad made a video of our collaboration WeeBook, which you can check out here.

As always, thanks for reading,

Blogger Dad

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When I was a child, books provided an escape from a world in which I didn’t fit in. I found my fingers tracing illustrations carefully crafted on pages, longing to be in a world where things made sense. A world where mysteries were to be solved and adventures to be had by children my own age.

One of my favorite series of books was in fact not so much a book, but collections of Peanuts comic strips. I have many fond memories of curling up with old Peanuts treasuries and getting lost in the world which Charles Schulz created. I felt Charlie Brown’s pain. He was a kindred soul who also had trouble fitting in with the people and world that surrounded him. I laughed at Snoopy and his wacky adventures. I wondered with Linus as he explored the human condition and thoughts theological in nature. I identified with Lucy’s misplaced rage.

Each panel, so succinctly drawn, pulled me in with the little things. The way Charles Schulz drew the lines of rain, covering most of the panel as Charlie Brown was stuck in a rainstorm. I felt that rain. The way snow lines flowed in the background, the way a single leaf would fall down from a tree. I was TRANSPORTED to that world and it felt safe and comforting.

So, why am I talking books and comics?

Well, it is these childhood treasures that shaped who I am today as surely as a pen draws a series of strokes which shape words and images. These books made me want to write, made me want to draw comics, made me want to create and bring worlds alive for others to lose themselves in.

Many worlds

The internet has become to many, what books were for me as a child – escape.

The web offers us access to more worlds than we can imagine, real and imaginary. The web also allows us something books never did – to sometimes meet our fellow world travelers. Whether it be chatting with fans on a message board or interacting with the artist themselves, the web opens up a host of possibilities which never existed before.

Sometimes, it even allows creators to meet and author a world together. A marriage of words and images. Two worlds into one.

When worlds collide

I was thrilled recently to discover Writer Dad, another writer who has strong devotion to words and his creations. I was honored when he asked me to help bring one of his worlds to life. While the first story he pitched to me is still in the creation phase, we decided to collaborate on another project he was looking to complete. One which aims to help parents and children through a sometimes difficult phase – potty training.

Told with humor and love, Number One and Two It should help ease some of the trepidation that parents feel about the subject.

Writer Dad tells a little of the story behind the story in his appropriately titled post today.

So. yeah, this is a lot of buildup for what is essentially a story about where your poo goes, but it’s not everyday that you meet someone who you can trust enough to help you build a world. The collaboration, along with the words of others I’ve met in the past three weeks since this blog began, has refueled my desire to create more worlds. Perhaps, maybe even build a world you (or your children) to get lost in.

Here is a picture of the book’s cover. I hope you enjoy it as much as we enjoyed creating it. You can order the wee-book below or at Writer Dad’s site.

(Special thanks to Jayniebell for the photo of the book sign)