Thanks to everybody who wished my family well in the comments and via email. I’m glad to say, we’ve recovered from the swine flu. I’ve got a lingering cough and am still a bit tired, but otherwise, I’m feeling 100 times better than I was.
Now, on with today’s post.
My two year old son, E, is going through a whiney phase. When he doesn’t get his way, he goes from zero to 60 on the Tantrum Express in two seconds flat.
It begins as an “eh” followed by a louder “eh”
Followed by a constant barrage of increasingly louder “eh”s while pointing at what he wants (or wants to do) repeating:
EH EH EH EH EH EH EH EH!!!!
Over and over and over and over until my head feels like rabid monkeys are cage fighting with ladles and aluminum trash can lids.
And it drives me nuts like few things on this planet can.
My wife defends E, saying that he’s going through a developmental phase, where he’s learning a lot and sometimes it’s too much to process and he reverts back to more infantile ways to express himself or to cope. She could be right, I know I sometimes feel like regressing to cope.
I don’t know what the hell to do when the whining begins. Because my instinct is to do whatever it takes to shut him up as quickly as possible. Since I won’t hit him, I try to reason with him.
Note: Reasoning with a two year old is like trying to reason with your average political talk show caller. It can’t be done. They already have their minds made up and there is NOTHING you can do short of giving them what they want to pacify them.
I try to ignore him but that doesn’t work at all. A two year old WILL NOT be ignored. Not as long as you have ears and he has a voice.
Ignoring him would be a bit easier if he didn’t get so easily upset. His cry is on a hair trigger alert. Not all the time, but a lot recently. And if he gets upset, he is likely to start breathing fast, snorting and then, all of a sudden he is puking all over the place.
Like a big giant puke sprinkler.
(note to readers: You’re welcome for that lovely image)
And since I don’t like whining and I REALLY don’t like cleaning puke, I probably give in too often. Even though I thought I would be the ultra tough disciplinarian.
So, any of you parent vets in the whining war have any tips or advice? Feel free to leave a comment.
For those who have not yet had kids, I leave you with this wonderful Public Service Announcement.
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